Results tagged “Parents” from Kazza the Blank One

$#!+ My Dad Says

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Before Dad died I started collating a list of silly things my Dad used to say.  There turned out to be quite a lot.  And I'm sure I've missed heaps.

As mentioned yesterday, there were a few random song snippets, such as "they're coming to take me away hey hey" and "beep beep, beep beep, his horn went beep beep burp".  Somewhat relatedly he'd sing "Sunday driving, Sunday driving" when we were out and about on a Sunday.  If we saw a delapidated building in our travels, the parents had a running joke that it was a "prospective youth hostel".  

When someone did something wrong, he'd say "nooo that's not it, try it again", as per Yosemite Sam.  Actually my brother and I changed the default error beep to that wav file many years ago on the parents' computer, and we had months of laughs because they couldn't figure out how to change it :)

When anyone offered him tea or coffee he'd say "I don't drink, don't smoke, don't drink tea or coffee, don't go around with naughty women".  This was appended in later years with "because I don't know any".  Actually this is why he thought it was so unfair that he had a brain tumour, as he didn't use a mobile phone either.  Still, he'd also say to people "I'll have a vodka and orange. Hold the orange" and at other times "Hello officer, I'm not under the affluence of incahol" in a slurred voice.

Regarding physics, he'd say things like "It's only the lack of heat that makes it cold", "It's only the weight of it that makes it heavy" and "It's not the fall that kills you it's the sudden stop at the bottom".

He could be quite negative (actually that's another story entirely).  But with Mum there'd be such things as "I earn the money, she spends it", "Whatever you say dear", "Yes boss" and "I'm always wrong".

With us there was the whole "Seven eights!!" thing that haunted David around Western Australia in 1984.  David was in primary school and learning his times tables, so on the holiday Dad would call out random times tables for David to give the answer to.  Except he kept tripping up on seven eights.  So Dad did it over and over again getting quite angry with David about it.  Mum said Dad changed on that trip.  He had issues with his camera and basically became a lot more negative and grumpy about things from that point on.  Mum thought he had a mid life crisis at that point.  He'd get annoyed at us for "drop" or leaving things around the house, but actually he was probably the worst offender.  And if we ever happened to burp at the table he'd say "oink".  To which after 1995 I'd respond "la la laaaa" :)

He'd get very frustrated with "yellow lights!" even more so than red ones, and also "Sunday drivers".  If a someone was heard shouting or speaking loudly, he'd say something like "We heard you the first time" or "ahhhh shaddap".  And if someone was incompetant they "couldn't organise single track working on a single length of N gauge".

He loved cockatoos, and the family had one when he was growing up.  So there was always "Scratch cocky" and "Hello cocky" and "G'bye! G'bye!" in screechy voices.  The doves he used to feed were "girls" because they were birds, so it'd be "hello girls" when they came down.

He liked cats, and whenever he saw one he'd say "I tawt I taw a putty tat", or simply a realistic meow (actually he'd meow at pretty random times too).

He loved cheese.  Or "ratfink".  And if anyone ever said "say cheese" for a photo, he'd say "Coon", his favourite cheese.

Whenever he got home and wanted to get changed he'd say "I'm going to take me pants off".  I use that a lot myself now too.

Many every day objects got different names.
"Soviet" was a meat pie - soviet spy in rhyming slang
"Serve you right" was a serviette.  I use this all the time, which confuses people sometimes.
Police were sometimes pronounced "poh-lice", or just "the fuzz"
"Screaming ice" was ice cream
"Gobbies" was his word for potato scallops
"Jackie" was a kookaburra
"Franks" meant thanks
"Probabully" was probably
"Grey shirts" were the train ticket inspectors.  He had an irrational thing against authority and beaurocracy.
"Woofit" meant "what's for tea?"
"Crick" was creek
"Rake" was a lake
"Crouds" were clouds
"Riv-her" was river
"Hurro" was hello
"Martian bastard" was a Mars Bar
"Chew and spew" was McDonalds
"Chif and phips" was fish and chips

And there was plenty of other random $#!+ .. :)

"Pong!" - obviously a response to ping!
"We want a funny story from" - sometimes said at random at the dinner table
"Growl, grumble and gripe, da dum da dum da dum" - the da dum bit might have been appended by my brother, can't remember
"Around the corner and into the straight comes beetle bomb" - or BDL Bomb, after the number plate of their old car
"Screech crunch tinkle tinkle" was a car accident
"Sparkle-arkle-arkling" usually referred to fizzy drinks
"Arc arc arc" or "stone the crows" whenever crows were around
"Die quietly" if someone was coughing loudly
"No bull" for no kidding
"Me three" instead of me too (I use this too)
"Me think that 'mazing" if something was good
"Bless me" if he sneezed
"Oh girl. You can't say oh boy, that's sexist".  

When my friend Luc first met my parents he said to me later "I can understand you better having met your parents".  Maybe anyone that's just read through the above list of words and phrases will see what a crazy Dad I had and understand how I came to be so completely silly :)

Peking Duck and Pizza

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On Tuesday I met up with @StuartCRyan for lunch at Super Bowl in Chinatown.

We had a whole Peking Duck.

And it was amazing :)

Super Bowl Peking Duck

Super Bowl Peking Duck

We ated the whole thing :)

Tuesday night David and Yvonne came over to mum's bearing pizza (they forgot to take the leftovers, so mum and I had them the next night). 

After the pizza we all trekked downstairs and David made some suggestions about what was likely to have any interest for people and what could safely be thrown out.

We also found more of Dad's not-very-secret chocolate stash.

Dad's chocolate stash

Wednesday night I came home again.

So spent a couple of hours downstairs today looking around at all the stuff and taking lots of photos of it all.  Correction, photos of a fraction of it all.  What I thought was going to be big job is going to be a *huge* job.  And the little brother definitely needs to inspect it all as well before we even consider getting rid of any of it.  That, and waiting to get a more definitive diagnosis about what's happening with dad.

Parents' Garage

Dad's workshop

Dad's workshop

Back alcove

Back alcove

Front alcove

We went and saw Dad again this afternoon, and he was still depressed.

Then went to Ikea, but the thing I wanted to buy was out of stock - doh!!

Half Way Through

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Yesterday we had a pretty quiet morning.  But it was such a lovely day we decided to go out to the club and try out our new caravan.  So went out and enjoyed the sunshine, and had drinks and dinner with some of the other people there, then played some cards then went to bed.  Turns out sleeping in a caravan is a lot more comfortable than sleeping in a tent!  Who knew?  We also managed to lock ourselves out of it within ten minutes of arriving.  Thank goodness John was there with a spare key! 

Our caravan

Our caravan

Our caravan

Stu's rissoles

This morning after quite a long lie-in (it was freezing!) we got ready then helped out with some hazard reduction, as well as having some sausages for lunch.

Hazard reduction

Came home and called the parents, only to hear the bad news that the prognosis is not very good for Dad.  So that made me pretty sad.

Did our food shopping then came home and found my betta, that I've only had for six weeks, had died.  More sadness.

Then spent *ages* making up some lasagnas, only to have the sweetie eat a good chunk of my leftovers (mine had white sauce and lactose containing cheese).  Blah.

Then lost it cause the house was a pigsty.

It's only 9:30pm, but it feels a lot later.  Not sure how I'm going to be able to stay up..

So it seems my mother found my blog by putting my conspiracy address in the search bar instead of the address bar.  Damn my google rankings!  Luckily it's dropped off the first few pages, so you never know, it might take her a while to find it again ;)

Oh no!

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So I got an email from my mother today.  She has found my blog!! eeep!!  That is somewhat scary....!!!

Prince Palace

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Took the parents to Prince Palace tonight.  It was as generic as it was last time, but I guess not too bad.  The shantung chicken was pretty nice.

Had a crap afternoon.  Got told off for being silly and now I'm paranoid things are going to go badly for someone.  *sigh*


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Parents (and brother) came down this afternoon.  Except they need entertaining .. actually no it'd happen anyway .. Mum gets bored and just hovers over me to see what I'm doing .. all the time...!!

Is very tiring .. :/

They've gone to bed now, so have the computer screen to myself briefly to blog .. 

Early morning tomorrow.. some of us need to be at the airport at 8:20 .. and I get the easy end - Chay and David have to be at their airport at 5am ?!??!!!   *comfort* in advance guys! :)

Urghh... tiring weekend....

Saturday morning had to go shopping and clean the house.

Found this recycling bin at the markets in Gungahlin which cracked me up..

Sutherland Shire Council recycling bin

So then the parents arrived. Stu made a delicious vegan-friendly fried rice for lunch, and then we looked at honeymoon photos. Pretty much all afternoon. :/

Around 6pm we headed off to Della Rocca for dinner (our birthday dinner, the parents' shout). I had a veal dish (allan pana I think) which was pretty good. But we still had room for dessert, so had some.. heh. Even managed to convince mum to drink a little of the sparkling cabernet we took along (!)

Veal at Della Rocca

So came back and finished going through the honeymoon photos. Mum liked the Legoland and Alps pics the most. Dad didn't really care for all the "city" photos.. but as that was about 95% of the trip, he got a little bored.. hrmm..

This morning we sat around wondering what to do when Potty called up and said they were heading out to Casuarina Sands for a picnic, so we tagged along.

The ducks came to be fed..


Walked down to the weir which was very pretty..

Reflections on the Murrumbidgee River

Scott made Jake a raft, so they brought it down to launch it..

Jake and his raft

The boys scrambled out to the middle..

Boys on the river

It took a couple of relaunches to get it to finally go..

Raft re-launch

Having done that, we wandered home again.

The parents left, and just after that, Annie and the kids arrived. We all went for a little walk.

This galah watched us..


It was very bright in the sun..

Bright Light!

And then home again.

I slow cooked a roast pork for dinner. We considered inviting people over, but we were a bit peopled out by this point. The pork turned out really well, and really cheaply too - the bone was very small, so mostly meat at $4.45/kilo.

And that was our weekend. I could use another one...


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Really must figure out how to blog from my Blackberry...

So Friday we tidied house and did fishy-type things before heading for the Big Smoke. 

Stopped in Goulburn for lunch, and got an alternative view of the Big Merino.  And strangely enough this was the only photo I took all weekend!  How unlike me! :)

Big Merino backside
Dropped in on D&Y, and even remembered to take my toaster oven, which me little brother fixed for me... he rocks!  Had afternoon tea there before heading to my parents'.  Dropped off my Lego cake-topper and picked up pinking shears and had a very Stu-unfriendly dinner which he suffered over for the next day or so :(

Then headed up to J&G's where much wii-ing was to be had.

Needed to point out that Sydney roads are horrendously bad.  The physical state of them that is.  The car rattled and bumped like you wouldn't believe. Had forgotten how awful some Sydney roads are.

Saturday we went on a shopping mission to Bondi Junction.  Stu got the hiking shoes he was after.  I tried on some too, but they didn't have as good arch support as my runners, so didn't get any.  We even ran into John, which was pretty cool.. as I thought it might have been nice to have lunch with him but it was all too hard by the time I thought of it.  Oh well.

In the evening Ralph and Ali and Luc and Liz came over with various kidlets and George did a massive roast in three ovens!  We played Emporer-Scum as that was the easiest game that scaled well to eight people.  I went from middle to third to fifth to Scum, then back to third.  Stu went out as Emporer :)

After the others left, we played more wii, and had wii-shoulder the next day to prove it :)

On Sunday I went to church with J&G while Stu recovered.  Then a quiet afternoon.  Stu went and visited Tim and Dave and Dave gave us a jackstone!  Which are devilish little things to make.  I went with J&G to A&M's where much wine was drunk and food eaten. 

And then sadly it was time to come home.  I lost it going past the airport.  I *miss* Sydney, and Sunday night dinners, and my friends and living next to the airport.  *sigh*  Managed to stay awake til Sutton Forest, but after that I collapsed and didn't regain consciousness till our street.

Today was spent recovering and tidying and shopping and honeymoon planning.

And have to go back to work tomorrow :(


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It was my dad's turn today to get pieces of him sliced out.

Apparently he's doing ok, but has not talked to his doctor yet..

Our Saturday

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It was very hot today.  We didn't feel up to doing too much.  We went for a bit of a drive to have a look at a potential wedding venue, then headed out to Gold Creek to feed the fishies and have some lunch.  We had lunch at Cafe Injoy, which wasn't as good as last time (dirty glass, a caesar salad that wasn't), but still not bad, including some yummy zucchini balls.  Then we came back here and collapsed.  We really didn't have the energy to deal with my parents, so hid out in the study for a bit, and then they decided to go home.

This arvo just bummed around.. I wrote up my MT4 stuff.  Had some cheese kranskies for dinner and watched the Negotiator because Stu hadn't seen it.

And that was pretty much it.. boring really .. ;)

It's Friday...

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Had had enough of work by about 4pm, but couldn't go home cause my parents had my key :(  So had to hang around another two hours being completely bored (and hungry).

Fortunately when we got home the parents weren't there, which gave us some time to recover and regroup before they did get home.  And gave me some time to have a couple of drinks which helped a lot... !  Then I cooked them some kangaroo steaks and we ordered pizzas.

Didn't do too much tonight.
But had to wait and wait for mum to go away before I could type this..... sigh ....

Parents are here..

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Parents are here.  Makes it hard to get anything done because mum likes to sit behind me and watch everything I do on the computer :(  (and sneak quietly into the room behind me)

We did have a nice dinner at the Dumpling Inn tho..
Patch Tuesday last night.. my computer will probably reboot itself tonight.. oh well it needed a reboot.. it's only been a couple days since the last one after all!   Google Earth chews up so much memory in vista that after not doing very much, it stops being able to save the myplaces file.  Internet Explorer still isn't working right either. Hasn't been since either a patch or perhaps scanner drivers were installed.  I don't have the spirit to fight with it though, which is why I'm just using Firefox.  The parents are coming to stay for a couple of nights tomorrow.  Could be .. er.. interesting.. especially when my father will have to deal with the sleeping arrangements up-close-and-personal-like.
Kazza's "Boring Life Of a Geek" aka BLOG

IT geek, originally from Sydney, moved to Canberra in 2007. Married to "the sweetie", aka Stu. Prolific photographer, Lego junkie and tropical fish keeper.

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