The Dilbert Principle

Hoteling

The only drawback to the cubicle-oriented office is that some employees develop a sense of "home" in their little patch of real estate. Soon, pride of ownership sets in, then self-esteem, and poof - good-bye productivity.

But thanks to the new concept of "hoteling," this risk can be eliminated. Hoteling is a system by which cubicles are assigned to the employees as they show up each day. Nobody gets a permanent work space, and therefore NO unproductive homey feelings develop.

Another advantage: Hoteling eliminates all physical evidence of the employee's association with the company. This takes the fuss out of downsizing; the employee doesn't even have to clean out a desk. With hoteling, every employee has "one foot out the door" at all times.

Hoteling sends an important message to the employee: "Your employment is temporary. Keep your photos of your ugly family in the trunk of your car so we don't have to look at them."

- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle, 1996

Wednesday morning I woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep - stressing about work.  Said goodbye to our floor at 4:30 and went to the pub.  As you do.

Thursday morning I woke up at 2am and couldn't get back to sleep - stressing about work.  Got in early, but of the three sections (sections, not teams) in our home zone, one section had spread themselves out along most of the windows, splitting the rest of the teams up.  Very unsettling day.  Went to the pub.  As you do.  But as I was leaving, I was convinced I heard them talking about me, and so I had a full on meltdown when I got home.  I haven't cried that much about work since my very first night on 5 November 2007.  

I read The Dilbert Principle probably twenty years ago, and that section above has stuck with me all these years, as it resonated with my feelings about working at OzEmail back in 1996-1997 - where I would get into work an hour early just to get the same seat every day (Como to St Leonards to arrive by 7am - was pretty awful).  But now I just can't get in that early, as the sweetie can't (unless I catch a 6:30 bus).  Which means ongoing stress every single fricken day FOREVER.